Friday, February 24, 2012

Damn Brandon Inge for Being Merely On Time

Tom Gage of the News ruined my day. His piece criticizing Brandon Inge for merely showing up on time for Spring Training instead of being early did the worst thing someone could do to me. He made me feel bad for Brandon Inge.

Gage can eat a box of diseased rabbit turds. The baseball season is incredibly long. Spring Training is weeks of pointlessness that could be accomplished in two. Switching from third base to second base for a guy that’s been in the Majors for over a decade isn’t rocket science. Lighten up, you putz.

Look for Gage to follow up on this soon as he brings Inge to task for these other crimes against baseball and/or humanity:

-Brandon Inge disrespects team by taking the last donut from the team’s breakfast spread without asking if anyone else wants it.

-Inge admits to have cried at the end of “Field of Dreams” the first time he saw it. Is he too sensitive for the game?

-Inge says he’s not a fan of rice and beans. Thus, is a racist not seen since the days of Rod Allen.

-Brandon drops to #2 in friendliness to reporters behind Don Kelly. Is this a sign of the money going to his head?

-Inge heard bragging that he CAN believe it’s not butter. Is he too cocky for his own good?

-Delmon Young sneezed today. Inge didn’t say “God bless you” afterwards. Why does he hate black people so much? Or is it GOD that he hates?

-Inge quoted as saying he doesn’t watch “Jersey Shore”. Is he too out of touch for today’s game?

Point is, between his lack of hitting and the silly things that come out of his mouth, Inge has enough working against him. You don’t have to go around making up new things for the ignorant masses to get all over the guy about, Tom.

You’re better than this.

7 comments:

Bluesabriel said...

THANK you. I didn't even read the Gage piece because it made me so angry

Kinger said...

I read that 

Kinger said...

I read that terrible excuse of an opinion article and wanted to punch Tom Gage for this garbage.  I am not the biggest Inge fan but I don't think he needs an article about how he showed up on time being the worst thing in the world. 

ItsHarold said...

Inge is my Tiger this year. Hate the haters.

Damian56xx said...

Could swear that I read another ink stained wretch online, castigating Inge for arriving on schedule, just can't relocate the damned article.

BrandonSain said...

Maybe this is a blessing in disguise?  If the Detroit media turn on the guy, maybe the blind fans will follow?

Jimmy Bell said...

The way the Gage piece was written was poor, but from the way it sounded, he wasn't just not early, but by 3:12 pm on reporting day, he still wasn't there, which sounds like him being officially late to me.