Friday, December 30, 2011

Tiger "Letdowns" of the Past Decade

Someone forwarded me a link to an article at Bleacher Report on the ten biggest Tiger letdowns of the past decade. Normally, I avoid BR like Don Kelly avoids productive offense, since it tends to make my head hurt and the voices inside start telling me to burn things. I’m sure many of you have had similar experiences there. But it’s a decent enough topic, even though I disagree with the majority of the author, Sean Rinehart’s choices.

For those of you expecting me to do my usual poor-man’s Ken Tremendous FJM hack job on it, I’m sorry. There’s no need. It’s written decently enough, in my opinion, but I just think there were better choices to be made. We all have our different versions of what a letdown is, I guess.

If you aren’t in the mood to sort through the annoying slideshow that they like to do there for some reason, here’s the author’s list of letdowns.

10. Neifi Perez
9. Alex Sanchez
8. 2006 Detroit Tigers
7. Fernando Vina
6. Joel Zumaya
5. 2008 Detroit Tigers
4. Edgar Renteria
3. Jarrod Washburn
2. 2009 Detroit Tigers
1. 2003 Detroit Tigers

Personally, I find the majority of these to not be considered “letdowns”. After the jump, I’ll get into why and what I would have chosen in their places.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

A Blast From the Past

A couple of weeks ago, I was watching an episode of “Hoarders” on TV and it got me thinking about the several boxes of old baseball cards I’ve been lugging around since I was a kid. It finally clicked in my pea-sized brain that the thousands of 1989 Topps Gary Ward cards were never really going to be worth anything and pay for my retirement, the way I imagined back in the day. So, I began sorting through them and pitching 90% of what I found.

In one of the boxes today, I found some old Sports Illustrated magazines. As I was tossing them, I noticed along with them, an old Detroit Tigers Magazine. This was a program that I apparently bought at a game in the late 90’s. As I began to leaf through it, I couldn’t help laughing at what I was reading.

Today, I’d like to share some of that with you. Prepare to facepalm.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Tiger Droppings: After-Holiday Hangover Edition

Oh, hello there. Nice of you to stop by. Did you have a good Christmas or whatever other late-December holiday you may celebrate? I hope so. Mine? Thanks for asking. It was okay. I still didn’t get that chainsaw I’ve been asking for.

There’s not a whole lot going on right now as far as Detroit Tigers news is concerned. But I’ll try to cover what stuff is out there. Today we’ll get into free agency, random nonsense, and other things.

Vague? You betcha. Interesting? Probably not. But let’s see what we can come up with.

Friday, December 23, 2011

The Obligatory Christmas Post

Happy Christmas, boys and girls. It’s that magical time of year when, in theory, we’re all supposed to be nice to each other, appreciate our families, and spread cheer to our fellow men and women.

In reality, everyone is stressed out over traffic, money, and buying presents. People are ruder than Barry Bonds talking to a reporter. And we all just want this nonsense to be over with.

And in my case, I’m sick again. This marks four of the last five Christmases that I’ve had the flu. I currently have the luxury of knowing what Jim Leyland’s lungs feel like on a daily basis. It’s a conspiracy concocted by Jesus and Santa, I tell you. Bah…humbug.

But, being the GIVER that I am, I thought I’d spread a little holiday cheer with a list of presents that I would give to those in Tigertown if I had the magical powers of Mr. Claus, Tim Tebow, or whatever.

So allow me to empty my sack (hohoho) and let’s get this sleigh on the road.

Monday, December 19, 2011

My Five Favorite Tiger Teams

Is every MLB offseason this boring? I’ve been racking my brain for something interesting to talk about for a couple days now. But I just have no interest in further free agent speculation or what trades Double D could POSSIBLY pull off. If it happens, hooray. We’ve got something to discuss. But the B.S. rumors are growing tiresome as Spring Training just cannot seem to get here quick enough.

Of course, this being the site where sports journalism goes to die, I had considered doing “A Christmas Carol” with Scrooge Ilitch being visited by the spirits of Ty Cobb, Brandon Inge, and Jacob Turner. But as adorable as Ty’s charming racism was coming out, I just didn’t think it was very funny overall, and scrapped the whole idea.

But I did finally come up with a topic I don’t remember getting into on here before. I’ve covered my favorite players and moments multiple times. But I don’t think I’ve ever gotten into my favorite Tiger teams since I started watching baseball in 1985. So that’s what I’d like to do tonight and take a look at my favorite five Tiger ballclubs of the past 27 years. Ugh…I’m getting old.

Friday, December 16, 2011

The Twelve Days of Christmas: Tigers Version

Well, it’s been a slow week in Tiger news. And with holiday parties and assorted nonsense at work, I’ve been busier than Rick Porcello in an unsupervised sorority house this week. But in the holiday spirit, I composed a Christmas Carol listing the recent Tigers activities for you. It took about 15 minutes.

And it shows. Sorry…

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

2011 Detroit Tigers Holiday Shopping Guide

Well, boys and girls, the holidays are upon us and that means it’s time once again for Your Party Host to sort through all the Tigers merchandise that’s out there and bring you the BEST OF THE BEST for that special someone on your list. Tis the season to be merry
"That’s my name."

Can’t see the line, can you Russ?

Anyway, here we go, straight from the official Tigers shop on

Monday, December 12, 2011

Will Rhymes' Tiger Career Comes Up...Short. Hohohoho...

Via the official twitter of the Tigers, Will Rhymes has been non-tendered by the team, making him a free agent.  Expect to read many a "boo hoo" from the odd section of Tiger fans that worship the undersized, untalented, white, Quad-A players the farm system keeps churning out.  As for me, I couldn't be happier unless I found out Don Kelly fell off a cliff while chasing a road runner.  Didn't even have to use my was a good day.

I offer the following as a small (snicker) parting gift to 'Lil Will...

Poor Rhymes.  He always got the short end of the stick.

St Patty's day in Detroit will never be the same again.

I'm sure he can still get his old job back working for Mr. Wonka.

Okay, that's enough.  Don't want Will to track me down and kick my...ankles.

Godspeed, Tinkerbell.  I'll be toasting your contributions into the wee hours of the night.

Friday, December 9, 2011

What Albert Pujols Has Taught Us

"People from other teams want to play in St. Louis and they're jealous that we're in St. Louis because the fans are unbelievable. So why would you want to leave a place like St. Louis to go somewhere else and make $3 or $4 more million a year? It's not about the money. I already got my money. It's about winning and that's it. It's about accomplishing my goal and my goal is to try to win."

-Albert Pujols, 2009

The deal with the Angels will pay Pujols around $3 million or $4 million more per year than the offer from the Cardinals.  Ouch.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Gr8: #1 Miguel Cabrera, Man of Redemption

The “Great Eight of 2011” will be a look at the eight Tigers that impressed me the most in 2011. The order I am choosing these players in is not necessarily who the best overall player was. No, these guys are simply the ones that made me say “wow” more than anyone for whatever reason. 

In March, Fox’s Jon Paul Morosi speculated that Miguel Cabrera was headed for his worst season as a pro, due to his DUI arrest and a slow start in Spring Training.

Yahoo’s resident jackass Jeff Passan mocked the Tigers organization and Cabrera for how they chose to handle Miguel’s off field incident.

The Freep’s Drew Sharp called for the Tigers to suspend Cabrera indefinitely to start the season.

Michael Rosenberg of the Freep wrote that Cabrera could turn up in more mugshots.

Lynn Henning of the Detroit News speculated that Big Mig’s career may be near an end.

And my least favorite writer in the history of writers, Mitch Album, referred to Cabrera as “a public menace”.

I was beyond annoyed with these clowns at the time and nine months later, I still haven’t forgiven any of them for the ignorant, ill-informed reaction pieces these “professionals” presented at the time. If you weren’t around this normally goofy blog then, it took a serious tone for a week as I defended Cabrera from these thoughtless attacks. If you wish to review them and read the full articles, click on the “Miguel Cabrera” tag and you can go back and check them out.

The point is, all of these “experts” were wrong. The Tigers and Miguel Cabrera were right in how they chose to handle his admittedly poor decision to drink and drive on his way to Spring Training. He somehow managed get his life together and focus on doing his job, putting together one of the finest seasons anyone has seen of a player in a Tiger uniform.

And for that, and the other reasons I’m about to get into, is why Miguel Cabrera is #1 on my list of Tigers that impressed me the most on the field in 2011. The man was simply outstanding.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Brandon Inge Sucks at Driving a Car, Too. Not Just Baseball.

(On a slightly snowy road, west of Ann Arbor…)

SPORTS TALK RADIO HOST: The Tigers are rumored to be interested in acquiring Daniel Murphy from the New York Mets to play third base in 2012…
BRANDON INGE: Hmm. Well, that’s a bunch of hooey. Let’s see what else is on.

/changes radio station

INGE: There we go! Baby, baby, baby ooh. Like baby, baby, baby ooh…I thought you’d always be mine! Man, that voice is just pure honey. Who DOESN’T have Bieber Fever?

/hits tiny ice patch

INGE: Golly! This isn’t gonna be good!

/crashes into four more morons too stupid to drive in 1/8 inch of snow

INGE: Jumpin’ gee willikers! I hope no one is hurt!

/rushes to closest car

INGE: Hey! You okay in there, pal?

/car door shoots open

Monday, December 5, 2011

Tiger Droppings: Let's Be Friends Again Edition

Hello, boys and girls. For those of you that don’t live in the Detroit area…I hate/envy you. It’s cold every day now. It never seems to stop raining. The other day, I got up for work and had to clear SNOW off my car. Sorry, I just wasn’t mentally ready for that crap yet. I swear, I almost just walked in front of a bus instead of doing it. Good gawd, I envy you people that live in areas of the country where the weather isn’t unbearable 10 months of the year.

Anyway, I’ve got a few topics to get through today. But first off, I want to thank everyone that took part in the Trammel Hall of Fame topic last week. I know I seemed to upset a lot of you with my take, but it turned into some good discussion and that was the whole point of it. The one idea of letting Tram in the HOF that I can’t get behind, though, is that of “Well, there’s a lot of shortstops with questionable numbers in the Hall, therefore Tram should get in”. If it were up to me, they’d toss out a quarter of the guys in there. I just view Cooperstown as a place for the elite, not the “very good”.

Also, I sense the Edgar Renteria comparison annoyed several of you. I did that for two reasons. One, because has him as the top player comparison to Trammell. And two, I’m kind of a jerk sometimes. If any of you really think that I consider Tram and Renteria anywhere close to being the same kind of player, you’re wrong and/or silly. I love Trammell. Renteria can fall into a pit of crocodiles for all I care.

Whatever. Many of you had good points and I enjoyed reading them. I hope I didn’t piss off too many of you. I promise I’ll try to make up for it later this post with a little surprise that ALL Trammell fans should love. I’ll also be tackling the rest of the Hall candidates, free agency, ex-Tigers, and more.

We can still be friends, right? Take me back, baby…

Friday, December 2, 2011

DIBS Voting 2011

So there’s this double top secret club called DIBS (Detroit Independent Baseball Scribes) made up of us Tiger blogging nerds. We meet once a year in a random, seedy, downtown Detroit location that I’m sworn to secrecy not to reveal. We all vote on some predetermined categories on the recent season. After, drinks are served, ecstasy and glow sticks are handed out, and bad decisions are made by everyone.

You haven’t lived until you’ve seen BYB’s David Tokarz drugged out of his mind, wearing nothing but a golden tutu, trying to convince Jen from Old English D that aliens are trying to communicate with us through Kurt Mensching’s penis. Meanwhile, Phil Coke’s Brain (wearing a gimp mask to conceal his identity) is in a corner playing Russian Roulette with John Parent and Austin Drake while RotT’s Sam is giggling like a lunatic drawing the whole thing in her sketchbook. Allison Hagen and Big Al sitting in a corner taking turns cutting themselves with a razor blade while she mutters “Casper” and he’s babbling “Millen”…crazy stuff.

I’m still pissed that the April in the D girls ended up leaving with the mLive guys. What a crock…hope they all got herpes now.

Obviously, none of that is true (or is it?). But we all did vote on some Tiger awards and I thought I’d share my votes, along with who the herd went with.